Flooding

I woke up in pain and it was still dark out. It couldn't have been too early though because the birds were chirping. I forgot that the blinds were down so maybe the sun had just started to rise. I lied in bed and recalled my dream.

I was in Downtown, Vancouver, under an overpass, moving snow in to slushy piles. It was raining and I was talking on my cell phone to Benni from DSDS. He asked me why I was downtown, "There's nothing down there." He said in his whiney voice. I laughed and looked around me. Across the street a group of people waited for the bus. One girl was wearing a full on rain suit. She had a long yellow rain coat, a big yellow rain hat, rain pants, and rubber boots--all yellow. All of a sudden, she fainted. She fell forward into a giant puddle and just layed there, face down. Everyone gave each other uncomfortable glances when another person keeled over. I told Benni what was happening, and he said, "Should've stayed in Germany, huh." "Yeah," I said. As I was putting my phone in my pocket, I noticed the puddles were getting deeper and spilling over into the street. The water raised past my ankles, so I started to run.

My heart felt like it was going to explode, but I couldn't stop. The crowd behind pushed past me as we ran up Cambie street. I knew I would be safe if I could just make it to this person but the crowd wouldn't let me get past. Finally the water reached me and dragged me down. "I don't want to die drowning," I thought. Then I woke up.

I guess I feel that if I go back to Vancouver, I will drown. Metaphorically, of course. I'm going back to finish my degree, but I'm scared I will fuck it up again and if that happens, I'm sure Benni from DSDS would've said, "Should've stayed in Germany." Arg. The dreams that followed after that all had the same theme and the same person. Don't understand.